Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. – Proverbs 14:1
What is a home? Think of what your home is like. What is your “dream home”? Now I’m not talking about the physical aspects like that perfect kitchen or master bathroom. I’m talking about the environment within your home.
The Business of Building
Our opening scripture reads “a wise woman buildeth her house”.
What does it mean “to build”? It literally means to make and to set up a house. This verse refers not only to the structure and upkeep of the home, but to the family itself.
A house is not always a home, is it?
Who is responsible for the quality of life in that place where the family lives? The woman!
We set the mood and maintain the atmosphere inside the home. A wise woman works diligently and purposefully to create that atmosphere. It’s not just a simple matter of hoping it will happen.
Creating the atmosphere
God gives us the heart, the wisdom, and the words to create a healthy atmosphere.
If things start to get hot (hot words, hot tempers, hot emotions), use soothing words.
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. – Proverbs 15:1
And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace. – James 3:18
If things start to get cold (cold hearts, cold feet, cold shoulders), go to work on warming the hearts.
Heaviness in the heart of man maketh it stoop: but a good word maketh it glad. – Proverbs 12:25
A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance: but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken. – Proverbs 15:13
All the days of the afflicted are evil: but he that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast. – Proverbs 15:15
These times will be a challenge, but seek to live God’s way and look to Him for the grace to do so.
Building a refuge
As the center of family life, the home ministers to our family far more than we might imagine.
What a blessing if every member of your family knows home is the one place on earth where everything will be all right.
Our children as well as our husbands benefit from our building efforts. Build a home where there is a world of lighthearted family life and no pressures.
Avoiding the negatives
The second half of our lesson scripture reads “but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands”. To pull down a home means to break or destroy it, to beat or break it down, to ruin it.
How can we pull down our homes? How can we be a one-woman demolition machine?
1. A woman can cause great damage by working destruction – What does anger out of control do? Throws, slams, tears, rips, and speaks words that break, destroy, ruin, and kill.
2. A woman can ruin a home by simply failing to work or being passive. We can slowly erode the foundation of our home by our laziness, by simply “never getting around to it”, by neglect, by not spending enough time at home. (Too much TV, too much reading, too much shopping, too much time with friends, phone, internet)
YES, BUT HOW?
Understand that wisdom builds
Wisdom builds and builds and builds by avoiding any attitude or act that doesn’t build. What you are at home is what you are. We are either about the business of building the home, its atmosphere and its order, or we are pulling it down through destructive attitudes and neglect.
Decide to begin building
Make a positive decision to do your work in the home willingly.
She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. – Proverbs 31:13
And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; - Colossians 3:23
The attitude of your heart is key!
Decide to immediately stop any destructive habits that are pulling down and destroying the little bit of heaven you are trying to build for others…and to the glory of God.
Each day, do one thing to build your home
Look around your home; make a list of things that need to be added, repaired, set up, etc. so that your area is more of a refuge. Start by doing one of these tasks each day. You may even need to add an attitude adjustment to your list.
Search your heart and your home. Where are you placing your focus and investing your energy?
Look beneath the cleaning and cooking and into your heart.
For the word of the LORD is right; and all his works are done in truth. The counsel of the LORD standeth for ever, the thoughts of his heart to all generations. – Psalm 33:4, 11